Trust

I can be trusted, it's one of my better gifts,
And I've been described as trustworthy
By people who are important to me.
I could be trusted but
I couldn't trust myself;
Even when my conscience and spirit
And everything else would physically
Shake me up from inside on out.
Now I'm paying for that abuse
For the remainder of my life
With what's left of my life.
She trusted me and I took that
Trust and misused it and hurt her.
I took her trust for granted.
Can I ever be trusted again?
Can I ever trust myself again?
Only God knows.

Taekwondo Big Sister

My taekwondo big sister,
Like the pine tree reaching straight
And tall for the boundless blue sky.
Her taekwondo roots grow deep in the earth
And ringed by her tiny growing pines.
Taking each one of us by our hands
And molding us into her martial likeness
As a potter shapes her unformed clay.
She's not asking the impossible of us, just
Making possible that which is within ourselves.
It's a new dawn breaking for me
After time and training and discipline.
With the power and patience of a saint
And with her big sister touch, white belt
With time and commitment turns black.
Her strength and wisdom to teach and train
Evident by my improved form and petty pain.
My old negatives fall to the wayside to be
Replaced by the way of hand and foot,
All thanks to my taekwondo big sister.

Why Do We Love?

Why do we love the people
We do the way we do?
Why do we do the things we do
To the people we love?
Why do we love the people
We love at all in the first place?
What is it about love and
How or who we love?
We live and we love.
We learn and we love.
We love and we love some more.
I suppose it doesn't matter who we love
So much as how and why we do.
I suppose it's all about love, simple as that.
I love you.

Looking For Direction

Should I lose direction
I won't have to look too far.
Direction is right outside my window
And right in my backyard.

Like water in a vessel,
I conform to the situation at hand.
Like a reed beside the rairoad tracks,
I'm strong enough to bend.

So the sun will rise
With each and every day,
I'm just as strong and certain
As the sun is every day.

The sun will set on my melancholiness
And drive it all away.
A new morning will come tomorrow
And bring a better day.

The birds and butterflies and
Dragonflies dance their ballet and
Cause my heart and soul to dance
Inside me once again.

I am boundless as the sky is blue,
As deep as the moonless night's hue,
Unbridled as the wind does blow
And thriving as my garden does grow.

So is my spirit and my mind,
My heart and my soul,
All I have to do is look outside
To find, inside, my direction.

I Count My Blessings

God be praised, I'm on my way,
The start of another great day,
I'm on my way to work
One more time.

Praise the Lord and my truck
Because she still runs
And I can still get up,
So here we go again.

Jesus loves me this I know
Because my mother told me so,
Which reminds me,
I'll have to call her real soon.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow,
So many back to back shifts
Just puts me in zombie mode,
But I'm making it payday to payday.

Angels sing His praise on high
For free food, free parking, and a
Fifteen minute drive.
I count my God sent blessings.

Oh, what would Jesus do?
I work so many long hours and shifts
And I put up with all sorts of shit,
At least I'm not taking it home.

Thanks be to God,
For my lowly little job,
I sleep well enough and then
I get up and do it all over again.

I Still Love My Dick!

( the really happy love poem continues )

Life sure is going well,
In fact, it sure is swell;
I still love my dick
And I'm here to tell.

Just the other day
We were discussing getting laid
And I asked him if
He had any particular preferences.

He said it didn't really matter,
He didn't need any references
And that he was a pretty good
Judge of personal character.

We've been together for quite a few years
And I've only questioned his judgement
Once or twice or maybe three times
I don't properly recall.

So we went to town
And he started to act a clown
Saying, "It's okay baby, you
Can't keep a good man down!"

I had to rein him in
And slap a raincoat over him
Before he dived on down
And into the thick of things!

The coy smile on her face
And the pleasant moan from her lips
Let us know it was all
Worth this quickie little trip.

We went and threw back a few
Then started out refreshed and anew
Talking smack, we went back
And got it up again!

"Once more into the breech, my friend!"
One more YEE-HAWW! before the end
Of these festivities and before we
Have to head on home.

At the end of it all and feeling 10ft tall
And pretty satisfied with ourselves
We headed to hearth and home
Until the next time when we'll roam.

I-303 Part Two

My imagination runs wild-
Tanned skin against skin, dark hair in a pile,
A storm of arms and legs in lovemaking at sea.
Passionate cries through the cabin door I hear.

Which two or three in the throes
Of erotic rapture and to the motion
Of the ocean when we were
Out upon the sapphire waters?

A slender attractive woman in her 20's,
An older plump lady, 30-40's and
A man about my size and age
Emerge through their cabin door, I-303.

Back in port and in
The hurly burly of debarkation,
In the rush of bags and luggage,
I catch a glimpse of you; of you all.

I return to my tasks and to my reality
Of bags and luggage and hurrying - my imagination
Running, I continue with the preparations from
Ship to shore and now just pleasant memories.

Patience and Wisdom

If only I had patience,
It would have been quite a blessing.
I'm not talking regret about the past,
But hindsight is 20/20.

The wise speak of patience,
Of course, it's more easily said
Than done. If I had only learned
It in my youth, but I'm still young.

Wisdom comes with age and
Experience and some don't learn
It at all. A little bit of wisdom
Would have done me a world of good.

Should have sought out wisdom in
My youth, even today isn't too late
Because today is the first day
Of the rest of my life.

I'll not dwell on shouldas, couldas,
Or wouldas or what ifs and such.
I'll be patient and maybe a little
More wise because I'm learning.

I'm opening my eyes and ears and
My heart and mind, even my very
Soul. I'm learning and growing and
Becoming a little more patient and wise.